No longer #MarriedToTheArtDepartment
Monday, December 4, 2017
Wednesday, November 1, 2017
I grew up in small military towns, and my whole goal when I reached dating age was to avoid all of the military people. Because, I didn't want to date one and fall in love and then spend the majority of our relationship alone. While I admire and am thankful for their service, that kind of life doesn't seem like something I would be strong enough to live in.
Fast forward to age 28 and I live in a big city, and I meet a big man, and we fall in love and we have a big baby. Then he begins advancing in his weirdo job, and we have another big baby, and then we get a little dog, and another little dog. Then his weird job takes him away for days at a time, then weeks, and now almost a month. Whoa, Life! I did not sign up for this crap.
I spent the last 26 days alone with my two boys. Let's not forget our beautiful dogs, Weirdo one, and Weirdo Two. 28 days alone with 2 kids and 2 dogs should be no big deal. But, apparently I'm having a mental breakdown. Everything seems impossible!! In hindsight writing this it wasn't that bad, but in the moments it was the worst!
The first week everyone was discombobulated. Everyone missed the Dad. There were tears, there were colossal fits, I may or may not have laid in the middle of the floor stomping my feet on the ground and flailing my arms. No one wanted to adult, and by no one I mean me. It didn't help that communication with the Dad was little to non-existent this time around. You don't realize you miss it until it's gone. You don't realize how absolutely sad and depressed you get when a piece of your puzzle departs to another state. It's weird how just hearing their voice seems to calm you but when you don't get to hear it, that's when panic sets in, at least for little old anxiety riddled me.
So week one went by, and no one died. Then we had parent-teacher conferences, and no one died. Then I had a kidney stone. I was wishing I was dead. But, again, no one died!
By week 2 the old dog had given up all hope that the Dad was coming home. He finally emerged from his kennel and set about picking a new human. Around the middle of week 2 he backtracked on this thought and reentered the kennel, it is the end of week 4 and he still has not emerged. At least, not unless dragged from the kennel and placed outside to do his business. Then placed in front of food to make sure he doesn't die of starvation while his human is away.
Week 2 was also fall break. No one tells you the joy of spending 24 hours a day 7 days in a row with your children. These precious little beings that you created in your own body, are occasionally the thing of nightmares. These occasions usually occur on school breaks. But fall break came, and fall break went, and no one died.
I would like to tell you what happened week 3. But I don't remember. I honest to God do not know what happened to week 3. There was illness, that's right that's what week 3 was; illness. Some god-forsaken virus that entered our bodies and created tons of snot and bad attitudes. This carried over into week 4.
Here I am week 4, day 3. What can I say about this experience? First off, no one is dead. So, there is that. Secondly, support is important when navigating Parenthood solo (don't be afraid to ask for help). I feel like this would have been easier in my twenties, before social media, before I could read on the internet everything I am doing wrong. But, in the end my children still love me, that's a win! Plus, not to be a repetitive...
But, no one died.
4 more days to go.
Fast forward to age 28 and I live in a big city, and I meet a big man, and we fall in love and we have a big baby. Then he begins advancing in his weirdo job, and we have another big baby, and then we get a little dog, and another little dog. Then his weird job takes him away for days at a time, then weeks, and now almost a month. Whoa, Life! I did not sign up for this crap.
I spent the last 26 days alone with my two boys. Let's not forget our beautiful dogs, Weirdo one, and Weirdo Two. 28 days alone with 2 kids and 2 dogs should be no big deal. But, apparently I'm having a mental breakdown. Everything seems impossible!! In hindsight writing this it wasn't that bad, but in the moments it was the worst!
The first week everyone was discombobulated. Everyone missed the Dad. There were tears, there were colossal fits, I may or may not have laid in the middle of the floor stomping my feet on the ground and flailing my arms. No one wanted to adult, and by no one I mean me. It didn't help that communication with the Dad was little to non-existent this time around. You don't realize you miss it until it's gone. You don't realize how absolutely sad and depressed you get when a piece of your puzzle departs to another state. It's weird how just hearing their voice seems to calm you but when you don't get to hear it, that's when panic sets in, at least for little old anxiety riddled me.
So week one went by, and no one died. Then we had parent-teacher conferences, and no one died. Then I had a kidney stone. I was wishing I was dead. But, again, no one died!
By week 2 the old dog had given up all hope that the Dad was coming home. He finally emerged from his kennel and set about picking a new human. Around the middle of week 2 he backtracked on this thought and reentered the kennel, it is the end of week 4 and he still has not emerged. At least, not unless dragged from the kennel and placed outside to do his business. Then placed in front of food to make sure he doesn't die of starvation while his human is away.
Week 2 was also fall break. No one tells you the joy of spending 24 hours a day 7 days in a row with your children. These precious little beings that you created in your own body, are occasionally the thing of nightmares. These occasions usually occur on school breaks. But fall break came, and fall break went, and no one died.
I would like to tell you what happened week 3. But I don't remember. I honest to God do not know what happened to week 3. There was illness, that's right that's what week 3 was; illness. Some god-forsaken virus that entered our bodies and created tons of snot and bad attitudes. This carried over into week 4.
Here I am week 4, day 3. What can I say about this experience? First off, no one is dead. So, there is that. Secondly, support is important when navigating Parenthood solo (don't be afraid to ask for help). I feel like this would have been easier in my twenties, before social media, before I could read on the internet everything I am doing wrong. But, in the end my children still love me, that's a win! Plus, not to be a repetitive...
But, no one died.
4 more days to go.
Sunday, October 1, 2017
School has started, the season has started, and life is just very hectic once Fall arrives. I know for some families it can be difficult to come together as a family and spend good quality time together. In our house we do something called Bed-A-Palooza, this is where we bring all the mattresses into the living room, put on our jammies and spend the night just hanging out and watching movies. We watch movies, jump on the beds, eat popcorn, eat way too many Red Vines, tell stories, talk about our week, and eventually we pass out.
This week's movie pick was free thanks to Pure Flix and their 30-day trial (I had to set my account up online to receive the 30-day trial when I tried to do it from my Roku it didn't work, once registered online it worked fine on the Roku). Pure Flix is like Netflix, except it's all wholesome programming. Family-friendly movies and TV shows. I tried it out before family night and was pleasantly surprised to see a warning before the movie that the content might not be acceptable for some little people. We here are pretty liberal with what we let the children watch. But, they have a different understanding than most kids since they have seen their Dad making movies their whole life. Still, when I'm unsure I end up watching a movie before the kids to make sure it is safe for the kids to view, then if it is okay I'm really bored when I go to watch it with the kids because I've seen it already. Only certain movies are meant to be watched again, again.
What are your families favorite movies? Here we love Wizard of Oz, The Nightmare Before Christmas, and the Guardians of the Galaxy movies. These are movies worth watching over and over. But, Pure Flix gave us an opportunity to watch some new things, like Finding Normal.
Fun Facts:
Finding Normal is directed by the director of one of my favorite documentaries Brian Herzlinger (I hope I spelled Brain right). The documentary is My Date With Drew, it's great. My husband has had the opportunity to work with Mr. Herzlinger a couple of times. The second time I asked him to please get my copy of My Date With Drew signed, and he did! Being married to the Art Department has some perks.
Where The Red Fern Grows was filmed on property owned by my family. The preacher in the funeral scene is actually my Great Grandpa. So, when I miss him more than usually I can just turn on Where The Red Fern Grows and hear his voice again. It's something very special to me.
So, who is up for Bed-A-Palooza?
This week's movie pick was free thanks to Pure Flix and their 30-day trial (I had to set my account up online to receive the 30-day trial when I tried to do it from my Roku it didn't work, once registered online it worked fine on the Roku). Pure Flix is like Netflix, except it's all wholesome programming. Family-friendly movies and TV shows. I tried it out before family night and was pleasantly surprised to see a warning before the movie that the content might not be acceptable for some little people. We here are pretty liberal with what we let the children watch. But, they have a different understanding than most kids since they have seen their Dad making movies their whole life. Still, when I'm unsure I end up watching a movie before the kids to make sure it is safe for the kids to view, then if it is okay I'm really bored when I go to watch it with the kids because I've seen it already. Only certain movies are meant to be watched again, again.What are your families favorite movies? Here we love Wizard of Oz, The Nightmare Before Christmas, and the Guardians of the Galaxy movies. These are movies worth watching over and over. But, Pure Flix gave us an opportunity to watch some new things, like Finding Normal.
Fun Facts:
Finding Normal is directed by the director of one of my favorite documentaries Brian Herzlinger (I hope I spelled Brain right). The documentary is My Date With Drew, it's great. My husband has had the opportunity to work with Mr. Herzlinger a couple of times. The second time I asked him to please get my copy of My Date With Drew signed, and he did! Being married to the Art Department has some perks.
Where The Red Fern Grows was filmed on property owned by my family. The preacher in the funeral scene is actually my Great Grandpa. So, when I miss him more than usually I can just turn on Where The Red Fern Grows and hear his voice again. It's something very special to me.
So, who is up for Bed-A-Palooza?
Saturday, September 23, 2017
Just kidding, people make good neighbors. Duh!
So, a month ago a lot of things in my house broke all at once. I had a mini breakdown of epic proportions. The dishwasher, my car and then the kid's ears, ALL BEFORE NOON!
The kid's ears righted themselves with rest thankfully. The dishwasher ended up being covered by the home warranty, it took about 2 weeks to fix but we didn't have to buy a new one!
I was quoted over $600 to fix my car. This made me cry, like a lot, a lot, a lot! I didn't have $600 to fix my car, and I honestly didn't want to put more money into a car I had just spent $1200 on the month before. But, I love that car, it's an old Buick. My insurance is cheap, it's a land yacht so I feel safer cruising around town in it. Since my husband was between shows we decided to just let it sit until we saved up the money to have it fixed. So, there she sat in the driveway collecting dust and bird poop.
Then for some reason, my husband asked our neighbor who is always working on cars if he could help us, he said yes! Just to order the part. Well, the fuel pump for my land yacht was $200 from the auto supply shops, we didn't have that. Back to just waiting. Then the neighbor called us and asked when we were going to fix the car. We explained we didn't have the part yet because we were low on funds. He said to check eBay, eBay is not what I think of when I think auto parts.
FIFTY-NINE BUCKS! That's how much I paid for a fuel pump on eBay. It took 6 days to get the part after I ordered it when the fuel pump came in we all went to the driveway to fix the land yacht. We took apart the trunk and removed the back seat. I'm short enough I fit perfectly in my truck in a squatting position. Which made replacing the fuel pump even easier. I FIXED MY CAR for under 10% of what a mechanic quoted me. Do you know how Super Hero like that made me feel?
I'm going to bake so much stuff for my neighbor. I have my car back because he's awesome.
Robert Frost said fences make good neighbors, but I'm pretty sure it's people that make good neighbors and I happen to have the best.
So, a month ago a lot of things in my house broke all at once. I had a mini breakdown of epic proportions. The dishwasher, my car and then the kid's ears, ALL BEFORE NOON!
The kid's ears righted themselves with rest thankfully. The dishwasher ended up being covered by the home warranty, it took about 2 weeks to fix but we didn't have to buy a new one!
I was quoted over $600 to fix my car. This made me cry, like a lot, a lot, a lot! I didn't have $600 to fix my car, and I honestly didn't want to put more money into a car I had just spent $1200 on the month before. But, I love that car, it's an old Buick. My insurance is cheap, it's a land yacht so I feel safer cruising around town in it. Since my husband was between shows we decided to just let it sit until we saved up the money to have it fixed. So, there she sat in the driveway collecting dust and bird poop.
Then for some reason, my husband asked our neighbor who is always working on cars if he could help us, he said yes! Just to order the part. Well, the fuel pump for my land yacht was $200 from the auto supply shops, we didn't have that. Back to just waiting. Then the neighbor called us and asked when we were going to fix the car. We explained we didn't have the part yet because we were low on funds. He said to check eBay, eBay is not what I think of when I think auto parts.
FIFTY-NINE BUCKS! That's how much I paid for a fuel pump on eBay. It took 6 days to get the part after I ordered it when the fuel pump came in we all went to the driveway to fix the land yacht. We took apart the trunk and removed the back seat. I'm short enough I fit perfectly in my truck in a squatting position. Which made replacing the fuel pump even easier. I FIXED MY CAR for under 10% of what a mechanic quoted me. Do you know how Super Hero like that made me feel?
I'm going to bake so much stuff for my neighbor. I have my car back because he's awesome.
Robert Frost said fences make good neighbors, but I'm pretty sure it's people that make good neighbors and I happen to have the best.
Wednesday, September 20, 2017
It is the worst.
Just check #huluupdate on twitter.
I think it beats out the New Coke in worst
business ideas ever.
It's a flashing rainbow mess of large text, that triggered a migraine for me:/
Even worse, my carefully curated list of shows I must watch is gone. This list has taken me years to perfect. With one update Hulu has flushed it down a virtual toilet. I don't even know how to watch the shows I am paying for anymore.
Bring back the old Coke, I mean Hulu.
Saturday, August 19, 2017
I woke up way too early this Saturday, and since I have no car and the kids were still snoozing I decided to watch a movie. I'll admit I only picked What Happened to Monday because the woman on the cover looked a lot like Kat Von D, and I wanted to see how bad it would be with her in it. Turns out it was not her, it's Noomi Rapace. She only looks like KVD on the cover art. In the film, she looks nothing like KVD. I had to google Noomi, I didn't recognize her, I also didn't really recognize anything on her IMDB. But, anyhow back to the movie.
What Happened to Monday is a dystopian thriller set in the future, 2073. A future in which the human race has decimated their food supply and is grossly overpopulated. A scientist comes up with a new way to create food, this Frankenstein food has some not so great side effects; birth defects, and multiple births. Nicolette Cayman a political figure played by Glenn Close creates the one child rule to ensure the safety of our future. The second child born is called a sibling (crazy unique I know). Siblings are sent to a cryogenic lab and frozen, to be thawed out sometime in the future when everything has been "fixed".
What Happened to Monday from 2053 -2073, it was bleak and gray, with no flying cars. The creators took a play from Minority Report and used hand controlled screens. Mirrors in the future will scan you and tell you how terrible you look in medical terms. Noomi plays the Settman Siblings. The Settman siblings are septuplets whose mother died during their birth, and their estranged Grandfather ends up raising them, in secret of course because of the one child rule. Grandpa names the septuplets after the days of the week since there are seven of them.
Grandpa raises Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday in an old apartment. When they are around 10 he creates an identity for them Karen Settman. Since they are identical in every way the siblings each play Karen on their namesake day. They have special bracelets that track and record their day (everyone in this future has them). They have an end of day meetings to review what Karen did that day so that the next sibling isn't lost on their day to be Karen.
All seems fine and dandy until something happens to Monday, then shit hits the fans and gets crazy! Noomi Rapace is as talented as she is buff (and holy hell this lady is ripped). The effects needed to pull off one woman playing 7 characters is equally impressive. It was pretty seamless and my suspension of disbelief was not interrupted by any flubs, or apparent CGI or green screen. It was done really, really well.
There was so much action in this film, and the Settman siblings' ability to think on their toes in a crisis situation will make you want to be their best friend in case of an apocalypse. If you can't have them maybe make friends with Rapace because she looks like someone one that would totally come in handy.
Finding out what happened to Monday wasn't predictable either, there is a WTF moment, and it was grand.
What Happened to Monday is currently streaming on Netflix.
Noomi Rapace played the Girl With The Dragon Tattoo which I never read, but after seeing What Happened to Monday I think I will.
 |
| This is the cover art on my laptop Netflix, it looked even more like KVD on my big TV. |
What Happened to Monday is a dystopian thriller set in the future, 2073. A future in which the human race has decimated their food supply and is grossly overpopulated. A scientist comes up with a new way to create food, this Frankenstein food has some not so great side effects; birth defects, and multiple births. Nicolette Cayman a political figure played by Glenn Close creates the one child rule to ensure the safety of our future. The second child born is called a sibling (crazy unique I know). Siblings are sent to a cryogenic lab and frozen, to be thawed out sometime in the future when everything has been "fixed".
What Happened to Monday from 2053 -2073, it was bleak and gray, with no flying cars. The creators took a play from Minority Report and used hand controlled screens. Mirrors in the future will scan you and tell you how terrible you look in medical terms. Noomi plays the Settman Siblings. The Settman siblings are septuplets whose mother died during their birth, and their estranged Grandfather ends up raising them, in secret of course because of the one child rule. Grandpa names the septuplets after the days of the week since there are seven of them.
Grandpa raises Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday in an old apartment. When they are around 10 he creates an identity for them Karen Settman. Since they are identical in every way the siblings each play Karen on their namesake day. They have special bracelets that track and record their day (everyone in this future has them). They have an end of day meetings to review what Karen did that day so that the next sibling isn't lost on their day to be Karen.
All seems fine and dandy until something happens to Monday, then shit hits the fans and gets crazy! Noomi Rapace is as talented as she is buff (and holy hell this lady is ripped). The effects needed to pull off one woman playing 7 characters is equally impressive. It was pretty seamless and my suspension of disbelief was not interrupted by any flubs, or apparent CGI or green screen. It was done really, really well.
There was so much action in this film, and the Settman siblings' ability to think on their toes in a crisis situation will make you want to be their best friend in case of an apocalypse. If you can't have them maybe make friends with Rapace because she looks like someone one that would totally come in handy.
Finding out what happened to Monday wasn't predictable either, there is a WTF moment, and it was grand.
What Happened to Monday is currently streaming on Netflix.
Noomi Rapace played the Girl With The Dragon Tattoo which I never read, but after seeing What Happened to Monday I think I will.
Friday, August 18, 2017
The good news is I'm still alive and breathing, and so are my people. We're all currently fully intact.
The bad news is my dishwasher, car and oldest kids ears are all not working properly.
It was like the worst game of Dominos ever, the dishwasher took a crap, then suddenly the car wouldn't start, then the school called. All BEFORE NOON!
I took my dishwasher apart if you've never done that, you should just to clean all the things. I put it back together and ran it on rinse, it still refused to drain. Now I have vinegar and baking soda trying to eat the clog out. Google said that would fix it. I hope Google is right on this one.
While my house fills with the stench of vinegar I'm waiting for a mobile mechanic to show up and look at my not running car. I hope it is something cheap and easy. If not I'm selling that beast and getting a basket for my bicycle.
My son's ears will be a wait and see thing. He is allergic to basically everything in the environment and has not yet mastered blowing his nose. So he gets a fluid build up in his ears, and then infections. I am hoping this is just a fluid build up and it will drain and take care of itself with rest. But, I still had to walk over to the school and get him.
But, you know even with all the crap raining down on me, it's FRIDAY! I know things could be worse, and I'm grateful they're not. I already had a good cry and freak out, and I'm sure when the mechanic gives me the news I will have another good cry and freak out. Then again another if the dishwasher won't drain.
I'd hoped to go hiking tomorrow, but with the luck, I'm having I should just maybe just stay home.
The bad news is my dishwasher, car and oldest kids ears are all not working properly.
It was like the worst game of Dominos ever, the dishwasher took a crap, then suddenly the car wouldn't start, then the school called. All BEFORE NOON!
I took my dishwasher apart if you've never done that, you should just to clean all the things. I put it back together and ran it on rinse, it still refused to drain. Now I have vinegar and baking soda trying to eat the clog out. Google said that would fix it. I hope Google is right on this one.
While my house fills with the stench of vinegar I'm waiting for a mobile mechanic to show up and look at my not running car. I hope it is something cheap and easy. If not I'm selling that beast and getting a basket for my bicycle.
My son's ears will be a wait and see thing. He is allergic to basically everything in the environment and has not yet mastered blowing his nose. So he gets a fluid build up in his ears, and then infections. I am hoping this is just a fluid build up and it will drain and take care of itself with rest. But, I still had to walk over to the school and get him.
But, you know even with all the crap raining down on me, it's FRIDAY! I know things could be worse, and I'm grateful they're not. I already had a good cry and freak out, and I'm sure when the mechanic gives me the news I will have another good cry and freak out. Then again another if the dishwasher won't drain.
I'd hoped to go hiking tomorrow, but with the luck, I'm having I should just maybe just stay home.